By Steve Pavlina
I recently asked some people to explain the difference between being judgmental and being selective. I received dozens of different answers.
Some people said that being selective is milder, more logical, less emotional, or more practical than being judgmental. Others felt they were just different words to describe the same thing. And still others had their own unique takes on the differences.
However you differentiate these labels, they’re variations on the underlying theme of observing and evaluating.
Once you make an evaluation, whether you prefer to call it judging or selecting or something else, you can make decisions based on your evaluations. This allows you to choose between different options, which is especially helpful when you can’t explore every option available to you.
Observe What Arises… or Give Rise to Something New
Another approach, especially when it comes to social interactions, is creating. This gives you more flexibility to experience what you desire, especially if your desired choices aren’t showing up very often yet.
For instance, if you decide to create a day that includes joking and laughter, and you interact on that basis, the people you interact with may or may not join you in that vibe. Some will be in the mood for it, some will be willing to get in the mood, and some won’t want to go there with you.
If you get a mismatch, it’s not a rejection. Just keep holding that vibe, and as you do, you’ll naturally attract more playful people who are delighted to share in such experiences with you. What is repulsive to some is deliciously attractive to others.
The same goes for creating financial abundance. Once you assume the posture of creating abundance in your life, you will quickly see your scarcity-minded friends, family, and co-workers fall out of alignment with you. Some may become critical of your new direction. Others will excuse themselves from your reality.
This doesn’t require controlling people, merely inviting them into shared experiences with you. Then let them accept or decline your invitation as they see fit.
In other words, instead of observing and evaluating others, you can assume a more creative posture, and then let others observe and evaluate you.
Read the rest of the article here: Steve Pavlina